#inspiredbytarot ~ on the brightest of days, my light shines right to the bottom of the ocean. on the darkest of days, my light is swallowed into the great abyss. | King of Cups, The Star
On this second day of my journey, I should be elated to see The Star. The guiding light in my Spirit Guide's lantern, the way for me to know The Hermit is near. And yet, I hesitate. Tonight, I see not the beauty in the vastness of of the universe, Her beauty highlighted in star power; instead I feel small, lost among the ancients and those more powerful then me.
Even the brightest of lights that fall from the sky, their grace accomplis and no longer needed that scares me. There is a difference you know, between a shooting star, and a falling star. I have seen both. I have been both. And it causes me to pause. I am here because I have shined bright. I am here because I have fizzled out and fallen.
There is a difference you know, between a shooting star, and a falling star.
I have seen both. I have been both.
I am here because I am burnt out.
This little light of mine...
The Star reminds me that I am capable. But I am scared, too. Like The Wheel of Fortune, the energy of The Star goes up and down, round and round. It can be brilliant, it can be dim. At a time when I'm not looking to be the first star in the sky at night, I'm also not looking to get lost in a sea of light.
The Star is a time of healing and renewal. It reminds me of both The Magician and Temperance, as she looks to balance spirit (stars) with emotion (water). I am connecting with the practice of Yoga in an effort to manifest this exact balance, but I am saturated. It is only day two of my 3 Week Yoga Retreat, and I can already feel The Star within igniting and snapping and dying. My breathing is incredibly laboured, with cloudy spots of discomfort on every twist and stretch. Any yet, there is an internal sigh with every movement, making it easier for me to release all toxins. It hurts though, when the toxins release. It gives me acid reflux, and burns a little... maybe kinda what it would be like if you ate a star and burped??
The Star reminds me that I have an ultimate divine purpose and vision, but I must move towards that vision in order to reach for it. I must have the stability of emotional health, or all that I long for and know to be mine will fall apart, and the millions of tiny pieces of star dust will fall to the wind. My hope, lost in the chaos of time.
I look forward to plugging into The Star, and recharging my batteries. To run again on full power, is a blessed purpose indeed.
Finding Duende,
Amanda
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